faith unfaded

I have taught kids the motions to Trading My Sorrows since its release in 1998. We practiced trading it all—sorrow, sickness, pain, shame—for the joy of the Lord.

Except when I’d get sick or become filled with sorrow, I’d forget how to trade it in for joy. I’d remain stuck in a prison of pain until the illness abated or the grief subsided.

But true joy is not circumstantial. It resides deep within and allows peace and contentedness to remain even in hard times. It keeps a well of happiness within even when sorrow takes center stage.

I began to notice the difference in my life a couple of years ago. Joy and pain began coexisting in my heart. Situations were not met with indifference, but rather a calm assurance that everything was going to work out.

This past weekend I got a horrible cold. I was not surprised as it had sent my dad to Urgent Care twice and then we traveled together to a family wedding. Patient Zero hacked all over the car for days.

It would’ve been a miracle not to catch it.

But I’d mentioned it to a friend this morning and he said he was sorry and hoped I would have a good day anyway.

I was already having a great day. Despite the coughing that tested the limits of a near-60-year-old bladder and a headache that felt like someone had knocked me out with a 2×4 the night before, I was genuinely happy.

I let the inside dog out, then fed the outside cat before settling onto the swing with him in my arms, rocking and singing to him for a few minutes. I realized how much I loved the simple life, and how blessed I felt.

Never once did any of that change because I was feeling sick.

I realized that trading my sorrows and my sickness didn’t mean I was healed or situations magically resolved. It meant that I could let the Lord hold them while I retained the joy.

My head might be pounding, but my spirit is dancing.

I’ve traded it all for the joy of the Lord.