faith unfaded

I was sitting on a bench at Gethsamani today, enjoying the sights and sounds of nature.

The three green benches formed a U on the concrete slab, much like my favorite classroom desk formation as a teacher.

I barely registered the acorns as they hit the slab until they started landing near me.

Several fell in rapid succession right next to my feet.

POW. POW. POW.

I squirmed a little in my seat.

BAM. BAM. BAM.

I looked up. I looked down.

Maybe I should move, I thought.

What just fell? I heard a voice whisper in the breeze.

Acorns.

Will they hurt you?

Not really.

Then why did you run around like Chicken Little declaring that the sky was falling when things got rough?

Why indeed, Lord. Why indeed?

It’s beautiful here. Much writing, reflecting, dreaming, and just being. To quote Taylor, there are no rules when you show up here.

Just a lot of people who needed a break. The kind only the Lord can give. I’ll be honest, I was at the point I would’ve gone anywhere. Thankfully the Lord sent me to a Christ-centered place.

While swapping stories with my first-night elevator partner and new friend S, she remarked, “Wow. It sounds like God sent you a life raft just in time.”

He did indeed.

By the way, even though we are both rebels and obvious soul sisters, we were not breaking the rules. Everyone talks. 😃 But it is quieter inside the retreat house. The rest of the grounds are open to the public and not silent. I’ve made many friends.

Including the dozen SILENT people who loudly laughed and reassured me I’d get my bearings eventually as I got turned around INSIDE A STAIRWELL!

Y’all called it. I can’t be quiet for anything. 🤣

But I can be still.

Unplugging completely isn’t an option when you hike the trails or need to check the time. Mealtimes run like a school schedule. Every minute counts.

But self-control keeps me focused on the reason I’m here and off social media. I will post a link to the blog post. I’m cutting myself some slack in this area. I’ve been a perfectionist my whole life. It’s time to live without putting such pressure on myself to prove my worth and value through the things I do.

I’m thankful for the opportunity, the suggestion, the prayers, the encouragement, and most importantly, the Lord, for this opportunity.

You will be seeing good things from me, I promise.

It may look different but we are in a different day in time. Next week I march.

This week I rest.

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10