Yesterday was tough.

We buried a dear friend whose love for life far outweighed most. No matter the obstacle, he’d face it with a smile and a determination to keep praising his Creator.

It wasn’t always easy. He’d faced some health issues over the years, even losing a leg and a couple of fingers in the process. But he was a jokester; he’d say they could chop off his parts one by one and his wife could tote him like a suitcase. He would laugh but yet he was serious.

He didn’t care. NOTHING was going to stop him from living life, loving people, and sharing Jesus. That’s just who he was.

Even though he’d faced these health issues, he’d been doing well so his death, mere minutes after arriving home from a 4th of July celebration with his grandkids, was completely unexpected. And devastating to those who loved him.

I know the consolations. He’s in a better place. He isn’t suffering. He’s with the Lord.

I know the verses. Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints. Psalm 116:15

But, while true, they do little to comfort you when grief is so overwhelming it threatens to swallow you whole.

I stood helpless yesterday as I watched my husband struggle to officiate the funeral. Don was one of the best friends he’d ever had and he was grieving too. Watching his wife was just as hard. They’d been married for 31 years, since she was 18 years old. I felt guilty that I was able to leave the service with my husband.

Last night, as I have in the middle of every night since we got the call five days ago, I woke up, grief still at the forefront of my mind. Why, Lord? Why now? I laid in the silence feeling the pain of loss as tears filled my eyes.

In the still of the night, I heard a line from an old country song ….Don’t cry for me down here.…

I knew the song well. When I Get Where I’m Going by Brad Paisley

Don and I both loved country music. We bonded over our love of music. We’d share behind-the-story tales of each song. He knew the info you’d find in a songwriting journal; I knew the info you’d find in US Weekly. We made a crazy pair!

I could just hear him singing those lyrics, trying to console me.

“When I Get Where I’m Going”

When I get where I’m going
On the far side of the sky
The first thing that I’m gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly

I’m gonna land beside a lion
And run my fingers through his mane
Or I might find out what it’s like
To ride a drop of rain

Yeah when I get where I’m going
There’ll be only happy tears
I will shed the sins and struggles
I have carried all these years
And I’ll leave my heart wide open
I will love and have no fear
Yeah when I get where I’m going
Don’t cry for me down here

I’m gonna walk with my grand daddy
And he’ll match me step for step
And I’ll tell him how I missed him
Every minute since he left
Then I’ll hug his neck

So much pain and so much darkness
In this world we stumble through
All these questions I can’t answer
So much work to do

But when I get where I’m going
And I see my maker’s face
I’ll stand forever in the light
Of his amazing grace
Yeah when I get where I’m going
There’ll be only happy tears
Hallelujah
I will love and have no fear
When I get where I’m going
Yeah when I get where I’m going

It was as if he’d written the song himself…and he wanted me to find comfort in it. I could just see him excitedly getting the answers to every obscure question he’d ever had while dancing around and yes, absolutely running his ten fingers through a lion’s mane…

This is exactly the song he’d want ANYONE to hear if they were grieving over him…. because that’s just who my friend was…

FULL SONG CAN BE HEARD HERE: