faith unfaded

I saw Mark Wills at the Grand Ole Opry last month. I was so excited to hear him sing 19 Something, one of my all-time favorite country songs.

In the 2002 hit, he sings about my own childhood in the 1970’s and 80’s…Farrah Fawcett hairdos, Rubik’s Cubes, 8-track tapes, Stretch Armstrong, parachute pants…

…and memorizing Pac-Man patterns. I remember those well. I can still play a Pac-Man screen up to the third level following patterns I memorized.

We fall into spiritual patterns as well. Sometimes they can be hard to break even when we clearly see we are headed toward GAME OVER.

I’ve been dealing with a lot lately and have had very little time to rest spiritually. As happens often, I grew weary. As the spiritual attacks got stronger my body got weaker. I gave in to illness just as I’ve done so many times in the past.

It was a pattern I knew well. It was also a pattern I needed to break. I gave myself a three-day weekend to lay around and sleep. I knew I was avoiding life and the spiritual warfare I’d been facing. I knew I was silently protesting the Lord by basking in the turmoil of my mind. My heart frequently rebels with anger over evil I want to destroy in the flesh.

But I cannot follow the same patterns I used to. It’s different now. I’m different.

This isn’t a video game. It’s a race of faith and I will run it with honor. I will ensure that each step from here on out is well-done and pleasing to God.

I know where the old patterns lead. That’s why I know I must break them. It’s no longer 19 Something. I’m no longer a baby Christian. It’s time to grow up.

When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 1 Corinthians 13:11

I strive now to have the mature faith He requires of me.

But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. James 1:4